Norway...

... is one of the most gorgeous places i have ever been to in my life. As soon as I got off the plane on the 24th of July, i was stunned.



I mean, honestly wow - you get to wake up in the morning to THIS? The mountains, the fjords, lakes, forests, trees...

When Brett picked me up at the airport in Kristiansand, i kept my nose against the window and there was no end to the sighs that came out of my mouth.
Guys, all the rumors you've heard about Norway being one of the most beautiful places in the world - they´re true.
So how come I ended up going there?
Well, to be rather honest - I don´t know. I made practically no efforts at all to go on this trip. It was just randomly organized for me by people from Foursquare. All I had to do was get on the plane and go.
The whole story started when I met up with Brett & Tammy Toft (pastors from the Foursquare movement and very good family friends) for lunch in Tallinn around April. I never knew them really well, but I just felt this odd urge to go and talk to them. I wasn´t really sure why or what I was supposed to say, but as soon as church ended that day, i couldn´t wait to see him and Tammy.
That lunch ended up being a long serious conversation about my future where God just did something with me. I left with a renewed spirit, a sense of purpose and clarity about where and why God wanted me to go.
But that was it for me. I never thought that dialogue would continue.
Some time later, I received an email from Brett where he invited me to a youth camp as a group leader. Before i could even start thinking about saying no because of financial difficulties, he said i would not have to worry about money.
I was like wow. Allright, i could do that. I could fly to Norway in the summer - id love to! And to a youth camp? Heck yes!
So he got me in touch with Adam, the camp leader. We e-mailed back and forth and in May, I had a cup of coffee with him (+ a few other guys) as well. And throughout this time, i could just feel something build up in me.. this sense that God will do something really significant for everyone involved with this camp.
Every time I met someone who was taking part in organizing it, I got more and more excited. It was the greatest privilege to be a part of something so amazing.
I was asked whether i could be one of the speakers at camp and not giving it too much thought, i said yes (yeah, i know, BIG surprise right there).
Time flew and suddenly it was time to go. I cannot put to words how glad i was to leave Estonia. The past 6 months of my life have probably been the hardest i have ever experienced, so i was on my knees grateful that God knew me better than i did myself, and He took me away before i could work myself to insanity.

The trip started with 4 days of just resting. I ´ll call it a retreat, because that's what it was. My time off from life, responsibilities and pressure. At the airport in Oslo, i had like 6 hours of waiting to do, so i took some time and talked with God. Just listened if He would speak to me.
He did. But in a way i would not have expected. I was all trying to focus and get my thoughts around what He was doing in me, when i suddenly felt Him ask me a question.
He said:"Hanna.. how are you?"
Me(obviously a bit shocked):"emm.. i´m good. there´s so much going on.. but its all going good - university, youth group, work..".
God:"Hanna.. how are you?"
I took my time before answering to that. Because i could suddenly just see my life from another perspective. I saw myself just working so hard towards something.. i called it divine purpose, but in real life, there was really little room for God.

Its kinda freaky the way you just don´t see yourself sometimes. Weariness hardens the heart and in a way makes you blind.

As i realized this at the airport, i was rather shocked. But i also had know idea what i needed to do about it - so i decided that i will just be right who i am... and allow god to do what he wants to do.

and I ended up being more blessed by the whole trip than i can put to words...
At the Toft´s house - just being able to be around them.. go kayaking, sleeep, do nothing, swim in the lakes, eat cherries, sunbathe... ahh guys i know this sounds unreal - but i think i actually had a holiday!!
After 4 days, i was a different person.
I have never really had like a mentor or anything like that in my life.. but God was so directly expanding my heart through who these people are. And it felt so good. So so good. I just let go of things i had been clutching onto in my life.

Then it was time for camp. I was just so excited to go! I didn´t know anyone besides Adam, but i could not wait to see where God was taking me.
And dude, i just LOVE international camps - there were youth there from Norway, Great Britain, Ireland, USA, Estonia.. all together about 60-70 ppl.
I have to admit i was way nervous the first day... i guess not knowing anyone at all can be intimidating. Hah, but when the group of Estonians arrived (i hadn´t met them before) i just felt like at home and got all excited!
This was my first time at a camp like this as a leader. And honestly - i felt like the biggest idiot, because i had no idea what i was supposed to do! Luckily neither did Kaspar, the other Estonian leader :D (tänks mees!!), so we just had a good laugh the first night, when all these instructions were laid before us and we were like... whatta..

Youth work is all about practice. There is very limited amount of theory, mostly just have to jump into something you´ve never done before and see how it goes. And that is just so much fun - its one of the reasons i love being able to do what i do! by the second night, my focus shifted from what i need to do to what God is doing in the kids. Ahh we had heaps of fun. And it was so amazing to see how God just changed the kids and the leaders!

My highlights - meeting absolutely amazing people, whom I hope i get to be friends with for life; seeing God at work so intensely; having a blast at the Bö waterpark...(yes, i did all the big and scary slides)


and getting so much changed in me in the process.

I am astonished...
There was one more significant thing that happened to me there. I totally fell in love with playing the guitar again - which is a huge deal, because i had kinda shut that bit out of my life. And i realized how much i had underestimated the importance of music as a part of who i am. I am so glad i am finding that bit again.. so you can expect to see me play again soon!!

well.. since its late and im getting tired here is my last thought of the day - if god tells you to jump, do it, because youre in for one amazing ride.

ill try to write again soon!

Love ya!